Now what to ask Santa for Christmas? We (at least I hope I am not only speaking for myself) already have one foot in the asylum, so why not ask big and put it all out there. Here are some of my suggestions for Christmas wishes to put on your list:
1 - A cook. (seriously. I get tired of the age-old question "what do I make for dinner?" I'm DONE! Let someone else deal with it!
2 - A maid (A most obvious choice.)
3 - A robotic vacuum cleaner. (One that can go ALL DAY LONG, because that is the ONLY way the floor will EVER be clean. Also, it must be large enough to pick up small toys and make them disappear FOREVER!)
4 - 2 more washers and dryers (OH! And an automatic folder and put-away mechanism as well. Laundry. WHO needs it?? Not I.)
5 - A volume switch for children. Or maybe a pause switch? Either would be fine, as long as it's easy installation and a lifetime warranty.
6 - A few pairs of warm socks (because I'm too cheap to keep the heat up high, and my feet are always cold!)
7 - A secret padded chamber. (A place to disappear, thrash about, scream and cry on those bad days, without scaring the children or embarrassing yourself!)
8 - A 2.5 year trip to the spa. Yes. 8 years of motherhood and 3 rowdy children DOES warrant this.
9 - 6 months uninterrupted sleep. This needs NO explanation. It is the only way to recoup after years of this mom stuff!
10 - A large salary. A large, tax-free salary. With a Christmas bonus, 8 weeks holiday, full benefits, etc etc.
11 - And finally, when those kids hit puberty, an EASY time of it. An easy, happy, well adjusted child who loves you forever and accepts every decision you make for him/her. One that does not argue, challenge, or glare at you.
Sorry Santa, it's a tall order to fill, but we deserve it =)
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